mamamonday: one can be enoughMonday, July 23, 2012
When you get married, people want to know when you're going to start having kids. You finally have one and you think, now people will STFU about our reproductive status. They do. For five minutes.
Eli was a whopping three months old when we started to hear it.
"Are you going to have another one soon?"
"It's easier to have them close together, you know...get everything out of the way at once!"
"When are you going to have another?"
"You want them to grow up together."
"You're 31 now, so really you have a few years left...you have time for one or two more, maybe even three!"
It's amazing how EVERYONE ELSE knows what's best for you, isn't it? How casual acquaintances, random strangers and family members you haven't seen in years start offering advice on when your ute should be occupied and how many times. And I know as Eli gets bigger, it's only going to get worse. After all, each week that ticks by is another week Eli and his Phantom Future Sibling aren't going to GROW UP TOGETHER!
The truth? "Family planning" is just a hilariously-named drugstore aisle to us. We don't have a so-called plan for our family. Peter and I have never sat down and said, "OK, We're going to have X number of kids at Y intervals". We don't know if we're having more kids, period. Maybe we'll have three or four. Maybe Eli will be enough. Maybe we'll add another kid to our family and then call it quits. There is no "plan". We have been blessed with a beautiful, healthy, happy little boy - he's plenty for us. If we're blessed with another baby, great; if not, wonderful. We're having fun and we're happy.
As a friend put it recently, "there's nothing wrong with stopping at one." So, so true. However, the idea of an "only child" seems to be a foreign concept for many people. "But...but...he'd be so lonely without any brothers or sisters? Who would he play with?" horrified people ask. Ooooh...we never thought of that. We were just planning on keeping him penned up in the linen closet for the first two decades of his life. WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN WE FINALLY SET HIM FREE?
Will Little E be an only child? Or will he be the oldest in a baseball team-sized brood? We don't know.
Until you see me with an epidural stuck in my back, just assume there are no siblings on the way. And don't worry about it.