Writer's Workshop: 10 things I miss about the single life

Friday, April 27, 2012

This week's writer's workshop prompt was to list 10 things you miss about being single, which is not an easy task for me. Not that I didn't enjoy being single, because I did, but it was not the healthiest time of my life. You can only subsist on draft beer, $10 white wine, and various forms of cheese before it starts to take its toll on your energy level and arse size. So the things I enjoyed about being single at the time (being drunk, shopping like a Kardashian, eating garbage) also contributed to me being unhealthy and poor. But the assignment is to list the good things about being single. Here's what I could come up with:

1. Having a flowered comforter and pink sheets on the bed. 

2. Unlimited TV access.

3. More closet space. 

4. Never having a middle-of-the-night toilet seat issue. (Oh wait, my roommate used to sleep with every random guy in the 902 area code and obviously if you don't care about who you're banging you're not going to care about things like putting the toilet seat down post booty call. You know what's worse than falling in the toilet in the middle of the night when your husband has left the seat up? Falling in the toilet in the middle of the night after having to listen to your roommate doing some dipshit she met at the Alehouse for hours.)

5. Not having to hide embarrassing musical selections, DVDs, Cosmo quiz result pages, etc.

6. Scented candles 24/7, including the really girly-smelling ones.

7. No debates about which family to spend holidays with.

8. Starfish sprawling in the bed.

9. Wearing the ugliest, most concealing, baggiest, flannely-est pajamas you can find.

10. Bodily functions sans embarrassment.

What do you miss about being single? Or if you're single, what do you miss about being in a relationship?

See this week's other writer's workshop posts here. Thanks Mama Kat!

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  1. Ah, this is tough for me because I'm in a relationship, but my boyfriend is in the military & deploys for a couple months at a time, so I still get tastes of singledom, especially the things you mentioned here. I miss these things a lot when Nathan is here - but I also miss flirting. Is that bad?

    1. I don't think it's bad to miss flirting! It would definitely be worse if you were flirting when Nathan was home :)

  2. I miss the starfish sprawl, too. My husband is military so there are some longer periods of him being away when I can have the bed to myself - bliss! I also miss guiltlessly going without shaving my legs for weeks in the winter, shopping without worrying that I'm spending "our" money (both cheques go into the same account t now), watching hours of chick TV, and not having to deal with smelly salami in my fridge. I also miss not having someone else around constantly. I'm more productive when hubby isn't home, but he pretty much always was home before I was (pre-mat leave)

    1. I definitely forgot about the being lax with the leg-shaving thing!