(Warning: If you're eating right now, stop reading. If you have a chocolate bar or a Tootsie Roll you were planning to enjoy later, maybe you should eat it now, then come back to this post in a bit.)

So now that my seven deadly sins meme is done, I can switch gears a little bit and talk about the more important and pressing issues that are going on in my life. Currently my biggest issue is that my dog eats his own turds. "Oh sure," you say, "my dog eats his own frozen poops all the time." Oh, but wait. I didn't say 'frozen turds'. We're talking fresh, steamy, just-hit-the-ground turds.

He goes out to poop. He poops, turns around, presumably to sniff it (why do dogs do this?!) but he WOLFS IT DOWN in one bite.

This has been happening for about a week or more. Before, he'd occasionally find a frozen hunk of whatever and chew on that, but now it's escalated to the point where he eats every single bit of feces he produces. We yell at him and tell him he's bad, and we don't give him a treat after he's just devoured his own poop, but it doesn't seem to be working.

What can we do? Do we have to go out with him every time he pops a squat and yank him away from it so we can pick it up? Is it a puppy thing? What is the appeal of eating your own poop?

Please tell me if you've had a puppy who loved eating fresh turds as much as Rory does so I don't continue thinking we have this sick maladjusted poop-fetish dog. We can bond about it.

Also...it's probably a good thing that this is my worst problem right now.