Peace out, '09

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Three weeks from today is New Year's Eve, which is traditionally my least favourite day of the year. I hate New Year's Eve for a number of reasons. It's a day to reflect on all the goals and resolutions I made 364 days before that have fallen by the wayside months earlier. In general, I spend a lot of the day thinking about the lack of accomplishments from the past year and how I need to do better. And I never feel like going out on New Year's Eve and dealing with drunks, absentee cabs and crappy weather. I want to stay home, eat crap, play Guitar Hero and ignore the fact that another year hasn't passed in which I've done absolutely nothing of any value.

I can't remember any other year that flew by as quickly as 2009. It's been a blur and I credit wedding planning, a hectic work schedule, and general Type A tendencies to that. The summer feels nonexistent and the entire span from September to November could have taken place over the course of a weekend. I have never experienced time passing this quickly before.

To sum it up, 2009 was a blur. It was a blur of worrying, planning, hectic deadlines and unnecessary pressures. There was a lot of running around, a lot of sleepless nights, a lot of hissy fits. There wasn't enough sleep, laughter, relaxation or enjoyment of life. In the past year I have not made time to go to the dentist or to see the "lady doctor". I had a total of two haircuts. I didn't talk to the bank about setting up a retirement account. I didn't reconnect with old friends. I didn't make time for any of that.

2009 wasn't a bad year by any stretch, don't get me wrong. My wedding on October 17 was one of the best days of my life and the week that followed in Paris was wonderful. I've had lots of lovely trips to the beach, visits home, dates with my husband and delicious meals. Everyone close to me is healthy and happy and doing well, and I try not to take that for granted.

At the same time there are some changes I'd like to make in 2010. I want to enjoy next year a lot more.

I want to see my friends more and hang out with them in my free time, and by "hang out" I don't mean, we've all been working 12-hour days for the past three weeks, let's go out this weekend and get completely shitfaced and cry about work. I mean, actual, enjoyable hang-out time as opposed to frantic sad inebriation.

I want to take better care of myself, which means getting to bed at a reasonable hour, taking my vitamins, not eating chocolate chips straight out of the bag by the handful, making my doctor's appointments and sticking to them, and being as active as possible.

It means financially too...this will be the year when I stop having all my money going into one bank account and just sitting there doing nothing. I'll start saving for retirement and budgeting much more carefully.

I want to take a vacation that's truly relaxing. I want to go camping and spend time at the beach this summer and not be on my BlackBerry the whole time, sneaking off to the car to "get a drink", i.e. check work email. I want to spend more quality time with hubby. Not necessary MORE time since we see each other pretty much constantly, but make better use of our time.

I want to enjoy every day more. Little things like a good glass of wine or a perfectly made cup of coffee, a bouquet of flowers, a Sunday afternoon to do nothing, a run in the park. It doesn't have to be a huge deal to be worth appreciating.

My goal for 2010 is to find balance--to not be overwhelmed with any one thing--and to enjoy every day. I want to have more spontaneous adventures, more laughs, better memories. Fewer night terrors and episodes of flipping out and feelings of guilt over not working out enough or not calling home enough or not visiting friends enough.

It's a daunting task but I think I can make a solid crack at it!

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  1. That sounds like a great goal. It's one that most of us in our 20s are probably struggling with. Best of luck.

  2. good luck. I too need to find balance next year...not real hopeful about actually achieving it though.

  3. All I could think was:

    I need to get me a bag of chocolate chips, stat.

    Thanks AMY..... :)

  4. All great goals ... I think we all need more balance in our lives. That's the best part of ringing in the new year, the renewed sense of clean-slate determination. Good luck with it all!