Language of loveThursday, September 26, 2013
But I cannot resist the siren song of an online personality test. (I'm an ESTJ; if I were a Led Zeppelin song, I'd be Tangerine; if I were a dog, I'd be a golden retriever: all things I know about myself thanks to online quizzes).
Anyway, love language: how we express our love to one another through actions. According to the book "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman, we primarily show affection using following five tactics - words of affirmation, spending quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, or physical touch - and different people respond to different love languages. One person feels loved when they receive lots of gifts. Another person needs physical contact to feel loved. This quiz shows you which love language resonates the most with you.
I was a little nervous to do this test in case I got "receiving gifts" as my number one love language. Nobody wants to be that guy that needs all the presents, right? But I know I like presents. So I was 99% sure I was going to score highest in the gifts department, and if that was the case, I wouldn't post about it. Or I'd re-take the quiz until I got a more satisfactory answer. (You KNOW you do it too. You took that YM quiz until you got Justin Timberlake as your NSYNC dream date. NOBODY got Chris Kirkpatrick and didn't take that test again.)
As it turns out, my number one love language is quality time, followed up closely by acts of service. So what does this mean? Spending a little one-on-one QT with my husband is when I feel most loved. When we're driving somewhere and Eli is asleep in the backseat and we're just chatting, or when we're talking about our days at work while out for a walk, or catching up over dinner. Runner up is when he puts gas in my car or cooks me dinner. Who doesn't love that? I agree with my outcomes, 100%.
Receiving gifts, the embarrassing Chris Kirkpatrick of test results, was number three for me, which makes me feel slightly less of a greedy pig than I was worried I'd be. Physical touch and finally, words of affirmation rounded out my list. Again, not a shocker. I'm not a real hugger and I'm definitely not a person who speaks a lot of lovey words (I threw up just typing 'love language', remember?)
If you're curious about which love language speaks to you, the assessment can be found here. For shits and giggles, get your partner to take the test. At the very least, you'll know whether you need to be doling out more hugs or more presents.