A week from today, I go back to work full-time. Eli will start going to his sitter's all day, and I will be an emotional wreck. That's my prediction: the next couple of weeks are going to be a full-on shitshow of feelings.

I'm trying to make the transition as easy as possible for our family, and in true "fail to plan, plan to fail", Type A fashion, my little brain is working overtime to try to foresee problems and issues and come up with solutions before all hell breaks loose.

Here are some of the things I've come up with to hopefully, fingers crossed, make things easier for us and help us all to be more efficient:

• lay out our outfits the night before. This way, we can wake up in the morning and not have to hem and haw in our closets (because that's EXACTLY what Eli does every day) and debate what to wear.
• plan meals for the week and shop for groceries on Sundays, so there's no last-minute scrambling or "what are we going to have for dinner?" "I don't know, what do you feel like?" dilemmas mid-week.
• set the timer on the coffee maker before I go to bed. Having caffeine at the ready when I wake up will get me off to a better start.
• make my lunch and Eli's snacks when cleaning up from dinner. Not preparing lunches in the morning frees up valuable time and it'll be easier to throw some leftovers and a couple pieces of fruit into a container in the evening. 
• pack our bags in the evenings: my work stuff, Eli's daycare stuff, my gym bag. Again, just cuts down on last-minute scrambling before we have to get out the door. 
• go to the gym at lunch when time permits. I'll be getting up at 6:00 as it is. Getting up at 4:30 to go to the gym in the morning is not happening, and I'll want to spend my after-office hours with Eli and Peter, not surrounded by gorilla juiceheads and Zumba bunnies slogging away on the treadmill.
• spend 15-20 minutes at night (MAX) cleaning up around the house, just doing the day-to-day tidying up, Swiffering, etc. to keep things presentable. 

good idea: taking your baby to visit your family for a couple of days
bad idea: taking your teething, constipated baby to visit your family for a couple of days without your husband as backup

Eli and I are back home today after spending some time in New Brunswick. I got a combined total of about seven hours of sleep the past two nights. Those who know me know that's not a good situation for this girl, who needs at least eight (ideally nine) a night to function. I will forever be jealous of people who do well on three or four hours' sleep. Other than the whole night owl foolishness, we had a great visit - lots of good food, Halloween movies, and snuggling with my baby niece.

Tonight I'm looking forward to putting on my un-sexiest PJs and going to bed at an absurdly early hour. Other plans for the weekend include carving our pumpkins and roasting the seeds, making a pot of chili and a loaf of brown bread, a few good workouts, and a walk with the boys in the park before ***FRANKENSTORM*** hits next week and all hell breaks loose. There isn't much that irritates me more than news headlines about weather before the weather even arrives. Seeing people panic about a storm that may or may not even happen and feeding off one another's panic online makes me want to quit the Internet forever.

We'll also be finishing up Eli's Halloween costume this weekend. Can you guess what he's dressing up as?

I have 12 days of maternity leave remaining before heading back to work full-time, and there are 17 days until Eli's first birthday. In between, we have a visit to my family's in New Brunswick, Eli's first Halloween, his first experience with his new sitter, and a whole host of appointments and things to take care of. Getting the house in order, stocking up the pantry, preparing for Eli's birthday party, and more. It's going to be a whirlwind couple of weeks, and everything's changing very quickly.

All I want to do is make a blanket fort, bring a few books inside, and stay in there with him for, ohhh...the next 16 years.

We've been trying to enjoy these last few days of mama-baby time. One of my favourite things every day is our afternoon walk. We bundle up and head out around the neighbourhood and point out everything we see - a particularly bright red tree, Halloween decorations on a house, a big dog. I love looking down at that little brown head in the stroller bobbing and gawking around and listening to him chatter on. We stop at the playground for a couple spins down the slide, some pushes in the swing, some crawling around on the jungle gym if it's empty, and I have been trying my hardest not to think too much about being away from him so soon, but rather to enjoy every minute.

Being present is a tricky thing. Why is it so much easier to worry and obsess about the future, about what's right around the corner and things that are weeks and months and years away, than to focus on what's going on right now? Lately I've had Christmas thoughts creeping into my head, and I've had to tell myself to relax. Let's get through Halloween and birthday first, then we can start thinking about Christmas.



Where has the past year gone?!