[+] I went to the gym yesterday with the best intentions to run 12 miles on the treadmill. I was going to set my pace slow and easy and watch the Canada-Finland hockey game and just slog through and get it done. Thanks to a sore, rolled ankle from Saturday plus stomach issues galore, 12 miles turned into 7 very painful, slow, and aggravating miles. I hated every step and I couldn't wait to be done. I threw in the towel and hit up the elliptical instead for one more angry mile to make it an even 8. It was frustrating and discouraging but I'm trying to use this as an opportunity to regroup and go for it again next weekend rather than beating myself up. 8 miles is better than 0.

[+] We're all done with winter at our house. Couldn't be more over it, in fact. Yesterday was a weather-filled day, not a fluffy snow day but a freezing rain slash ice pellets slash wet snow day. Eli and I holed up in the TV room to watch the Jungle Book in the morning while Peter shoveled our driveway, estimating that each scoop weighed 40lb. It's just getting really old and unpleasant and I curse my ancestors for not settling someplace tropical.

[+] Lately I am just feeling unable to get anything done. I have big plans and I can't seem to accomplish anything. I feel like I'm making long to-do lists and setting these goals, big and small, then doing NOTHING to work towards them. I don't know where to start. Everything seems like this massive mountain to tackle. Even simple things like making a dentist appointment, setting up a meeting at the bank, getting an oil change...I just don't want to do any of it. I HAVE to do all of it. Bad combination.

[+] Just so this isn't a complete waaah-waaah post, some good things have been happening. Valentine's Day! We celebrated with a morning workout and lunch out, followed by a matinee showing of American Hustle. Date night becomes date-day-when-your-kid-is-at-the-sitter's when you have a two-year-old, so we booked the day off work to spend some time together. American Hustle was good. I'd heard it was slow and boring - people lie. Saturday night we watched the newest Star Trek movie at home. Pretty good considering I hate space, aliens, lasers, etc. And yesterday we baked the best sea salt chocolate chip cookies ever. This recipe is my go-to. I can't even count how many times I've made it and the cookies always turn out perfect.

Dark mornings. Being cold all the time. Having to wear layers, including alternating the same two pairs of knee-high flat boots every other day. Having to go out mid-morning and move my car to avoid getting a ticket. The dog eating his poop and chewing the baseboards. Getting tired at 9:00 p.m. every night. No one wanting to come over because we live "too far out of town". No great movies in the theatre. No long weekends for months. Waking up to snow - even when it melts by noon. Nail polish that chips within a day. Passive-aggressive Internet snark. Having the same playlist on my ipod shuffle ever since Limewire shit the bed. The old woman in the gym who takes 10 minutes to get herself situated before she starts walking on the treadmill. The treadmill TVs not working. Not being able to find a parking space. Overflowing garbage cans. Not having a tan. Not going south. My looming birthday, one month from today. I'm not prepared. Paying more than $50 to fill my gas tank for the first time. Not having a decent desk chair in my home office. Furballs everywhere. Same soup for lunch for two weeks straight. Everything takes so long. There's not enough time to do anything. Consistently feeling like something is wrong, like something bad's going to happen. It's like running a low-grade fever for months that just won't go away.

I'm so sick of everything. First world problems? Definitely. Do they add up and take their toll? Absolutely.

I need it to be spring. I need something new to happen.

I did a little happy-dance this morning when I flipped the calendar page to March. This winter has been nuckin' futs, to say the least, with tons of snowstorms, freezing rain, and windchill factors. To say I'm looking forward to spring is the understatement of 2011.

Last night I made a spring cleaning schedule. I know. I need professional help. This is the first year we've actually had *a house* to spring clean, so it feels much more official than cleaning an apartment, which you only sort of care about, at least in my case. I want the house to smell like lemons and be able to eat off of every surface, it's THAT clean. The first step is to declutter, and rather than doing it in one big episode, my plan is to tackle one part of the house every day. One drawer, one closet, one basket of junk at a time, and throw out whatever we can afford to part with. Once that's done we'll be ready to clean. And hopefully by then it'll be nice enough to open the windows and get some fresh air into the house, which makes the whole spring cleaning thing so much more pleasant!

And I know it's a long way off, but I'm excited for the snow to melt so we can start some gardening and landscaping in the yard too. We moved in July, and it was hot as balls, and we had so much other stuff to do, we left the plants and flower beds the way they were. I have a lot of things I'd like to change, tearing out old wooden fencing, adding a new border, and planting some new things - tomatoes, carrots, beans, herbs and strawberries, a lilac bush, and some roses and other flowers I don't know the names of.

I can't wait to get some fresh mulch and fill in the sparse patches in our lawn. I miss the smells of spring - freshly cut grass and even that poop smell that fills the air when the ground gets mucky and everything thaws. Give me poop smell over snow and ice any day. I can't wait for evening walks with Rory, when the sun's still shining and breaking your neck on a patch of ice on the sidewalk is no longer a concern.

Realistically, it's the first day of March and this stuff is a long way off. A loooong way.




Still, I can't help thinking about spring today, making plans and getting excited about new beginnings.