rainy saturday: May 2009

I'm home sick from work today. Yesterday, I wasn't feeling 100%. My stomach was off, my eyes felt funny and I was really freakishly exhausted...like, six cups of coffee did nothing to help me stay alert, and even my bones felt tired, even though I'd slept pretty soundly the night before. This morning I woke up feeling iffy, but attempted my morning run anyway. EPIC mistake! The physical activity was enough to kick whatever's been brewing in my system into high gear. I came home and collapsed on the couch, took a brief email break to let my coworkers know I'm alive, and have been on the couch ever since watching the second season of Laguna Beach (proof that I'm ILL.)

I HATE calling in sick and usually spend my day off working anyway...which kind of negates to whole point of staying home to rest and recuperate. I'm scared I'm going to miss something, or worse, that people will realize the sun continues to rise and set without me being present (gasp!)

Even as a kid I rarely stayed home sick from school. Some of my friends' parents had super strict sick day policies: if you were too sick to go to school, you were too sick to watch TV, read comic books or play video games. My parents weren't like that at all. My mom didn't work outside the house and I think she actually enjoyed the company of having one of us home during the day. But no matter, I'd drag myself to the bus stop unless I was chained to the toilet or couldn't lift my head off the pillow because there was too much gunk in my sinuses. It seemed like every time I was sick and missed a day something exciting or awesome would happen--class pizza party, kid falls off the monkey bars and breaks his arm and everyone can see the bone, Mrs. Maxwell said "fuck" in front of the class...all cool, all things that are likely to happen on a sick day when you aren't there to witness them.

Even on my sick days I make to do lists. That's sick on a completely different level.

Goals for today:

1. Nap
2. Don't run out of toilet paper
3. Eat something nutritious (soup?)
4. Overdose on Vitamin C

I also plan on switching out my Laguna Beach DVD for The Office pretty soon, so don't get too worried about me.

Regifting: smart or just plain tacky?

Monday, May 25, 2009

Upgrade!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Grammar Lesson: Peek/Peak/Pique

Friday, May 22, 2009

Are there some words you love and others you disklike, or am I just a big geek?

Thursday, May 21, 2009

The biggest fail of all...

Monday, May 18, 2009

...is not bothering to try something out of fear of failing.

This past weekend I was all signed up and registered to run the Bluenose 5K. I felt pretty comfortable about doing well. I run almost every morning and generally do anywhere from 5-8K, depending on how many times I hit snooze, so the run would have been really easy for me. I had considered running the 10K and decided to practice up over the summer so I can run one with ease in the fall.

In the end, I didn't run the 5K. I was in the Valley for the weekend with H2B, which is a handy excuse. I could have easily come back to Halifax on Saturday evening or early Sunday morning without messing up our weekend away.

The truth was, I didn't feel like I'd be in the top placers in the 5K, and if I'm not convinced I'm going to do well I tend to not bother doing things at all.

The more I thought about the race, I imagined all the hardcore runners with all their elaborate running gear. The ones that time themselves and strive to beat a personal best every single day. The ones that are super competitive and can power through 5K in 16 minutes (like yesterday's first-place finisher did).

When I run I'm not out to beat any records. My average pace is about 9:30/mile. I like the fresh air, the quiet time outdoors and the little boost it gives me in the morning. I'm not competitive about it at all.

I'd be looking at a little under 30 minutes to complete the 5K. I thought about myself looking stupid in my baggy pink t-shirt and black yoga pants (no Running Room gear here) being the slowest runner and finishing with an embarrassing time compared to everyone else. I imaged crossing the finish line surrounded by four-year-olds and geriatrics. I could see my name on the results list waaaaay at the bottom. And rather than risk not being among "the best" I opted not to bother at all.

For the next race I register for, I have two options: train so much I'm practically guaranteed to win, or suck it up and participate regardless. I'm thinking option B makes the most sense.

When I was little I had tons of confidence--on the first day of swimming lessons, for example, I convinced the instructors that I could swim and got put into a much higher Red Cross level than I should have been in. "Everybody jump in!" the instructors told us, and I was the first one in the pool--eyes and mouth wide open, super pumped to be "swimming", because it looked so easy. Obviously I had to be hauled out of the pool by my bathing suit straps and ushered back down to the shallow end to join the Yellow group, feeling very deflated. Skating was the same thing. My parents make fun of me and talk about the first time I had skates on--I ran out onto the ice full speed thinking it would be a piece of cake. One very bruised toddler bum later I understood that I wasn't going to be good at everything on the first try...and that's when I started focusing on the things I knew I could do well and turning up my nose at challenging things.

These days, there's a little too much of that in my life. I know everything is a learning process and I'm too timid and hesitant as a result. I could use some more near-drowning experiences and ass bruises. What's the worst that can happen?

Nightmare on Horizon Court

Friday, May 15, 2009

Magic iPod. Try it!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

So, you want to work in advertising?

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Ode to H2B on our Haiku-iversary

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Dee-lish-us dishes

Monday, May 11, 2009

tagged!

Thursday, May 07, 2009

The Ghost of Lunches Past

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

We have a ghost in our office with a major appetite. No one has seen this ghost. No one knows when he/she comes out. We do know the ghost is hungry and has a penchant for things such as soy milk and Knorr Orange Soup--because these are just two of the things that have gone missing from the work fridge over the past week or so.

I'm writing this post from home because I went to eat my Orange Soup left over from Monday at noon, and it was gonzo, and I had to drive to Dartmouth to make food at home (oh, and lounge on the couch pantsless while watching The Hills on DVR, no biggie). Who eats half a carton of someone else's open soup? I could have spit in it, drooled, peed in it, infected it with swine flu, any number of things.

A coworker has been bringing soy milk to work for his coffee and that, too, disappeared at an alarming rate--as in, a two-litre carton was polished off in three days. That's not swiping a splash of milk for your coffee. That's drinking glasses and glasses and essentially bathing in soy milk.

How do you protect your food from the fridge gremlins?

I don't particularly want to start writing my name and the date on my food. You know how every office has that person that writes PAULA L. on every yogurt container and Lean Cuisine they place in the fridge, and when you go to grab your own Diet Coke or whatever, you notice the labeling and think, "what kind of a nerd writes their name and date on their food? Geez, Paula, no one wants to swipe your nasty-ass raspberry yogurt, you passive-aggressive asshole." And then you realize your Diet Coke has also gone missing. Cue sad face.

Meanwhile, Paula may appear to be an OCD food nazi, but at least come 12:00 noon she's om-nom-noming on her hummus and carrots rather than ransacking the office foraging for coworkers' old Twizzlers and stale Baked Lays to quiet her growling stomach. Oddly enough, people who are pathetic enough to steal food seem to be deterred by seeing a name scrawled on the container. Maybe they honestly think unlabeled food is public domain?

Tomorrow, I become a passive-aggressive Paula. I'm bringing Yellow Soup and it's going to have AMY written on it, large and in charge, all black Sharpie anal-retentiveness in front of God and everybody. So help me, if that soup goes missing, I will DNA all the dishes in the office microwave, track down the soup thief and lay the smack down real good. I can't even tell you the wrath that will ensue. Kitchen Goblin, someone else is going to be feeding your freaky food cravings from now on because Mama's going to be marking shit up.

Do you reeeeeeeeeeeeally want to know? A wedding planning update

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

"How's the wedding planning going?"

H2B and I hear this question every day at least 10 times, almost always accompanied by a been-there-done-that-I-know-it-sucks-and-I'm-glad-as-hell-it's-over smirk from people who are already married, or a you-unlucky-sucker-I'm-free-as-a-bird-saving-thousands-of-dollars-hahahaha smugness from those without marriage on the radar. I guess it's a natural thing to ask a person who's getting married in !!!165 DAYS!!! but it gets a little...frequent.

I snicker, shift uneasily and hear my own voice squeak about three octaves higher as I reply "Ehhhh, it's going!", realize the conversation has gotten totally uncomfortable and then strive to change the subject as quickly as possible.

The more I hear "how's the planning going?" I wonder:
-do people REALLY care about how it's going?
-do people really want to hear it's going well?
-are they expecting me to/secretly hoping that I'll flip out and have a major meltdown when they ask for entertainment and gossip fodder?

For those who really do want to know: I go back and forth between feeling overwhelmed ("OMFG, so much to do!") to completely hakuna matata about the whole thing. Yes, that was a Lion King reference. You're welcome. I need to settle somewhere in the middle, a happy land of getting stuff done while avoiding freakouts.

Right now, the biggest things I'm excited about are planning a honeymoon and designing invitations. Not so thrilling: choosing a first dance song and finalizing the guest list. How do you pick a song to dance to that isn't corny and overdone and completely lame, but still lovey and nice? Also, I'm pretty sure that when I die and go to hell for eternal punishment, my job is going to be creating a wedding guestlist and a seating chart for my family. I would rather clean elephant cages.

So the short answer to "how's the wedding planning going?" would be a shrug, a smile, and "OK, I guess!" It's going. Is it EVER smooth sailing? Is it ever as big a disaster as a Bridezilla would have you believe? The main thing is, this wedding is happening October 17. Everything will come together. Some things are ahead of schedule and others are more challenging. I'm not having the fantastic life-altering fun fun fun experience some girls seem to enjoy when they're planning their weddings. It's no nightmare, either. It's going. 165 days from right now, we'll be sipping on our to-be-determined signature cocktails and hopefully preparing to cut out of the reception and get into honeymoon mode. That means I'll probably be asked about planning...1,650 more times, minimum. I can handle this!